How to Handle Guilt and Other Caregiving Emotions
With caregiving, you might swing from feeling a deep connection to anger or sadness. Learn what feelings might come up and how to manage them. But how to handle guilt and other caregiving emotions.
Taking care of a loved one with an illness or disability can stir up some complicated emotions. You may have great days when you feel a deep sense of fulfillment and connection. And hard days, filled with guilt, grief, or anger. You might even have conflicting feelings, like love and resentment, at the same time. It can be challenging, and if you don’t pay attention, it’ll wear you down.
No two caregiving experiences are the same. What triggers one person may not be an issue for another. You have your own relationship to your loved one, rich and complex with your shared history. So it’s important to know there’s no formula for what you’ll feel or when. And there are no feelings you “should” or “shouldn’t” have. Emotions just arise whether you want them to or not.
To give the best care you can, it helps to know the kinds of feelings that might come up, how to recognize them, and what you can do to manage them.
Many people have these challenging feelings, at least sometimes. And these emotions can show up in different ways, day to day.
From being unappreciated to feeling trapped, caregiving stress can set off your anger. You might lose your temper or blurt out something that you normally wouldn’t.
If it happens, forgive yourself. Step away if you need to, or take a few breaths to center yourself.
You may have a long list of concerns: “What if I’m not around when something goes wrong? What if I make a mistake?” Anxiety happens when we feel out of control. It’s also a warning to pay attention and tend to your own needs.
Try to avoid focusing too much on what ifs. Keep your attention on things you can control, like making a backup plan for when you can’t be around.
People usually think of grief when someone dies, but it’s really about loss. When a loved one gets sick, it changes this person you know so well, which affects your relationship, too. That’s a loss.
You may need to grieve. Sometimes, you’ll just need to cry. And that’s OK. It’s one way your body releases that pressure.
This is very familiar for many caregivers: Guilt that you’re not doing enough, that you should be better at it, that you just want it to end. It’s a swamp you could sink in, but that doesn’t help you or your loved one.
Go easy on yourself. If you feel like you’re not doing enough, imagine if you weren’t there — look at the difference you make every day.
Every day, you confront loss and change. Sadness is bound to pop up. If it won’t let go and you think you might be depressed, get help right away.
You can start with your doctor or by talking with a therapist. Also, exercise and social activities are great ways to handle sadness and depression. Although they don’t fix the issue, they give you stress relief, energy, a better mood, and a social connection if you work out with other people.
Think of the tips below as tools in your emotional toolbox. You may not use them every day, but you have them when you need them.
Remember, tending to yourself means you’ll be a better caregiver. It’s not selfish. It’s a smart investment in yourself and your loved one.
Accept your experience. All your emotions — good, bad, and ugly — are valid. You can’t control them. And the only thing they say about you is that you’re human. The key is to let them be there and try not to act on them. See if you can understand what triggers a feeling. It may guide you to a solution.
Stay active and social. If caregiving takes over your life, you’re likely to burn out. Make time for friends, even if it’s just tea or a phone call after your loved one goes to sleep. And keep up with hobbies, community groups, and activities that bring you joy and meaning.
Take breaks. Schedule them in, if you can. If family or friends can’t buy you time, check with a faith-based or community group. Sometimes, they can send out volunteers to keep your loved one company while you take a break. Everyone needs time to recharge in their own way.
Talk it out. Some days, you just need to vent. Don’t hide your feelings. Talk to friends or family who give you positive support. A therapist can be a great help, too. You can be totally honest without fear of judgment.
Mom won’t wear her medical alert device. She might need some encouragement from you?
Or
Understanding the building process for the elderly is important.
Incorrect building design can increase the number of falls caused by trip hazards
Falls are unfortunately very likely within the disabled and the elderly community.
This why CareCallingNow was created to make sure the elderly are found ASAP.
A daily automated safety and wellness call to make sure #UROK
Reference: How to Handle Guilt and Other Caregiving Emotions
The Benefits of Wearing a Medical Alert Personal Alarm Device in Australia: Promoting Safety and Peace of Mind In today’s world, the benefits of wearing
The Importance of Medical Alert Jewelry: A Lifesaving Choice In today’s fast-paced world, the importance of safety and health awareness cannot be overstated. In fact,
If you have elderly parents or grandparents who live far away, you want to do all you can to help them thrive. With these Tips and Tools to Help Seniors Who Don’t Have Relatives Nearby. Alternatively, you may know a senior through your church or neighborhood who lives alone and doesn’t have family around. Whatever the case, these resources and tips from CareCallingNow can help ensure they’re taken care of.
ⓒ All rights reserved
